About Men and the Husband Store

I just received a forwarded e-mail that goes something like this:

The nice men are ugly. The handsome men are not nice.

The handsome and nice men are gay.

The handsome, nice and heterosexual men are married.

The men who are not so handsome but are nice men
have no money.

The men who are not so handsome but are nice men
with money think we are only after their money.

The handsome men without money are after our money.

The handsome men, who are not so nice and somewhat
heterosexual don’t think we are beautiful enough.

The men who think we are beautiful, that are

heterosexual, somewhat nice and have money are
cowards.

The men who are somewhat handsome, somewhat nice and
have some money and thank God are heterosexual are
shy and NEVER MAKE THE FIRST MOVE!!!!!

The men who never make the first move,
automatically lose interest on us when we take the
initiative.

NOW… WHO IN THE HELL UNDERSTANDS MEN?

Men are like a fine wine. They all start out like grapes, and it’s a woman’s
job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into
something you’d like to have dinner with.

What better way to answer this but with another forwarded e-mail:

The Husband Store!

 A store that sells husbands has just opened in New
 York City, where a woman may go to choose a husband.
 Among the instructions at the entrance is a
 description of how the store operates. You may visit
 the store ONLY ONCE !

 There are six floors and the attributes of the men
 increase as the shopper ascends the flights. There
 is, however, a catch . . .. you may choose any man from
 a particular floor, or you may choose to go up a
 floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit
 the building! So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to
 find a husband . ..

 On the first floor the sign on the door reads:

 Floor 1 - These men have jobs and love the Lord.

The second floor sign reads:

 Floor 2 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, and
 love kids.

 The third floor sign reads:

 Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love
 kids, and are extremely good looking.

 ”Wow,” she thinks, but feels compelled to keep
 going.
 She goes to the fourth floor and sign reads:

 Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love the  Lord, love
 kids, are drop-dead good looking and help with the
 housework.

 ”Oh, mercy me!” she exclaims, “I can hardly stand
 it!”
 Still, she goes to the fifth floor and sign reads:

 Floor 5 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love
 kids, are drop- dead gorgeous, help with the
 housework, and have a strong romantic streak.

 She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the
 sixth floor and the sign reads:

 Floor 6 - You are visitor 14,363,012 to this floor.
 There are no men on this floor. This floor exists
 solely as proof that women are impossible to
 please.

 Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store. Watch
 your step as you exit the building, and have a nice
 day!